Drugs or Jesus......

Is there anyone other than Me appalled with all of "those" commercials on the tube? You know the ones. Because I am a devoted "Guiding Light" fan (even tho I DVR it for later viewings) I am bombarded with the ads that the networks feel appropriate for us stayathome types. Geesh! It just shows-ta-go-ya that the network head are most defiantly males.

Within a 2 hour viewing slot one is able to view a myriad of these "helpful ads". Viagra still being the forerunner and possibly the classiest of them all. The handsome middle aged couple are seen walking down the beach, presumably discussing his "problem". (Not to mention Hers!) Then here comes the pitch and warnings for possible heart attacks and undying erections. Fade back to said couple holding hands while closing the bedroom door. Problem solved! Whaaaa?

At least it's better than "Smilin' Bob" looking especially randy wearing his Santa suit while a line of women wait for their turn on his "naturally male enhanced" lap. I love the girls with the wide eyes and pursed lips anxiously waiting to give it a little go. This very image has turned me off of all visits to Santa where sitting upon the lap is expected. My Granddaughter (not yet even a possibility yet) will just stand next to him with her huge list. Better yet, just give the list to "Nonnie". Sure odds on getting in filled without the weird lap sit situation. Recently at a party store I saw the little packets advertising a similar aid for women. Boy, a Crystal Lite slushie and some Enzyte for ladies all in one easy swipe. Can't beat that!

Then there's the KY for couples with the fabulous claim "His excites, Hers delights, and together they ignite". Who hoo! Certainly looks like it did the trick for the smug couple in bed with the sheets pulled up to their necks. All this good info at three in the afternoon. Just in case you might want to run out and procure some before the hub unit gets home at 5:00. Quick, there is still time!!

We are not going to discuss the issue of feeling fresh "down there". Or the pads, plugs, sprays, and gels that necessitate the perfect condition. They are as crude and offensive as I have just been. At least they can add the visions of lavender flowers floating in the air. Uh, okay.

One last one that certainly is a tickle and deserves a Honorable Mention. How about those ladies sitting around discussing God knows what, when the convo necessitates one of the women sharing the delights of her new massager-that conveniently fits over her finger. And it comes discretely in the proverbial plain brown package. Alrighty, then. Can't you broads find "Lovers Lane", "Naughty Time" or "Pricilla's" for goodness sake--they are on every corner. Or my Sister-in-law can schedule you a very special "Slumber Party" for your private needs. And She serves wine!!!

And last but not least the baby bear with the toilet paper cling-ons stuck to his furry little butt. Disgusting. Must we? Really? I prefer the ads with the darling labrador puppy having a spa day.
Cute, and gets the point across without the stupid visual..

It's a pity that as a society on the whole--nothing is sacred anymore. Crass, vulgar, inappropriate, gross, classless and invasive is more the norm. And that tired old T.M.I! And it's not even presented cleverly! Dumb images for a dumb society. Can you tell I hate it?

Done ranting. Gotta go. Time to try out my "Butt Lift in a Box". I'll get back to you on this one..... xoxoxox P.S. Congrats are in order for our darling friends, Tom and Kara on thier recent engagement! Love you guys... xo