So, what qualifies as a friend? I have many people that I see almost daily that I think qualify more as acquaintances really, than friends. I have many buds I see at the gym or Kroger checkout that certainly fall into this category. You know, you recognize each other, chat it up some and than carry on with your day. Subjects may include but not limited to the weather, the holiday, muscle soreness, etc. I have friends at work but somehow do not usually see them outside of the job. I have old friends from the salon that I joyously love to run into and catch up, but somehow never get together otherwise. I have friends I dearly love and miss, but again, do not find time to see. Also there are my cherished blog friends. Some that I have even met (Mark!) and hope to see again soon!
And then there is "facebook". People want you to "friend" them, so they can hopefully be your friend. While I do participate in the f.b. world--I do it reluctantly and sort of grudgingly. I explain that I really am more of a 'blogger' than 'facer.' It confounds me that someone who was barely a friend in high school NOW wants to be my friend. No offense, but I just don't know why they care. I love reading about my nephews and true friends and family posts. I HATE that I am forced to wade thru dumb game scores to do it. Who the hell cares about something called "Farmville", or "Yoville" or "Mafia Wars"? My 93 year young Gramma recently sent me a 3 page letter with all her news, and I intend to write her back. How cool is that? I prefer a little more privacy than an internet page allows. And I can't imagine that anyone is interested in the minutiae of my daily life. And I KNOW I am not interested in theirs!
So when my old friend, Stacey contacted me and set up a visit, I was (and am) thrilled to death! We hugged like not a minute had elapsed when in fact a few years worth of them had. It took alot of wine to keep our throats wet during 5 straight hours of conversation and laughs. You know you are with a good friend when that much time flys by like a minute! I loved it. It's very reflective to summarize 3 years of happenings to a convo that isn't boring or too self involved. And we did it well--I think.
It's also a great comfort to know that your friends are all right in this world. So much can go wrong in the times that we are living in. Truly a warm, fuzzy feeling if there ever was one.
As a person who is content at home, quietly enjoying time AND out of town alot, it is sometimes hard to maintain friendships. I thank all of you who patiently wait for me to answer a call, or to get together. Please NEVER stop! You are important to me. I think of you all often and fondly and don't mean to be an absent friend. Huge hugs to all of you and a BIG kiss to darling Stacey. Let's do it again sometime soon. And I mean it. This time I will bring two bottles!! xoxo
10 comments:
friends come in many shapes and sizes. Love my gym friends they always want to chat. Facebook friends let me find people I had not heard from in a long time. We had a very nice evening with friends from our church.
Thanks for being the one friend I can always count on.!!!!
I know when I was younger I spent far too little time maintaining friendships. THey really do need to be cultivated. I'm getting better but am nowhere near good at it.
Ah dear sister-in-law, you and I have very different feelings about Facebook. I love it and love that it has reconnected me with frends from the past, some of which I had been searching for and could not find until FB! You always have the option of not accepting the friends requests from those you don't care to reconnect with... I have done that on occassion. I also would not have known about my 30 year class reunion in 2009 had it not once again been for FB. And although I may not really care what all of my 120 something friends on FB are up to on a daily basis, I do get a kick out of some of the status updates and enjoy commenting on them just as people comment on mine. It's a way to share what is going on in your life and others share as well without a huge time commitment. We are often bad about making time to get together with friends due to other family, work and life commitments so FB allows us an opportunity to keep in touch without having to pick up the phone and get into a long conversation that we may not always have time for. You can keep the friendship going until you do have time to talk on the phone, have lunch or share that bottle of wine. I personally see a lot more benefits in FB than in blogging. Blogging really only tells one persons' story and doesn't really offer the opportunity for others to share what they are doing. It's really more about the person writing the blog and less about the people reading it. FB really does offer a quick way to keep in touch and for everyone to tell their story. Had it not been for FB, I also would not have reconnected with 2 of the children of my dear friend Connie who passed away 5 years ago. I recently found them on FB and we have been talking about their mother which has helped all of us heal...So for me, I am thankful for FB and that friendships it has allowed me to keep going and to renew. Love sissy
Friends have no lapses even though it be years between sightings, Friends remember the last word spoken that the conversation can resume right where it left off.
Yeh, I have to agree w/ Sista C. FB does have it's ups/downs but in all I have to say the up's out weight the downs.
Like C said... you always have the option to nix the friend that gave you a hickey in 8th grade. In my case a girl with pony tails.... it was nice to know that she gained weight, had 4 kids and drives a harley for work release. Needless to say.... I canceled her friend request after I read her updates. LOL.. sneaky huh!
FYI.. u can private yourself from anyone even looking up your name if you want. The only way someone can find you is if they stumble upon a page with you being in the friends list.
B-Jammin
This is so right on, Jodi, in every way.
Yeah, I'm not into the FB craze, Farmville, or "Friending" people. I often think writing by long-hand gives the writer time to cultivate his ideas; it's certainly much better putting a handscrawled line through a sentence then backspacing. Why write something if you're not going to leave a trace of what you once thought? --JR
Ok, seems I have been bitch slapped on my own blog. FB is FB. I have remained in contact with everyone I have ever wanted to. And I make time for those people and do not have to include a blow by blow of my day to do so. I find it totally public and impersonal. Fun, oh hell ya. But vital? Not even. Wading thru dumb surveys and "fans of" and "Mafia Wars" are a stupid waste of time. I do enjoy updates from friends and family. Blogging is a whole different animal. I use it as a creative expression and writing hobby. It is not meant to be anything else. And I like to belive it has more weight than "Jodi is getting ready to bake brownies!" And it has to be explained why you didn't "friend" someone. I am not out to hurt feelings, but....So all y'all just FB till you drop. I am still a blogger by nature. And to all of my dear blogger friends-- thank you for getting me! xoxo
Ohh come on... B-Slapped a little harsh. I luv ya gurl! just two different views hun.... dats all.
B-Jammin
Dear Sista... I wasn't bitch slapping you in any way... just expressing my feelings on the FB vs. Blog arena... just that simple. I love ya girl on FB or otherwise! But mostly I love ya in person, on the beach with a BIG ASS BLUE MARGARITA IN HAND! xoxoxo smooch till I see u again!
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